Published: 02 September 2010
by JAMIE WELHAM

WE'RE all f*****. 

This is the not-so- cheery message of Rupert Goold’s kaleidoscopic look at global warming, Earthquakes in London. 

He takes climate change – a worthy, woolly issue at the   best of times – and an unremarkable script by Mike Bartlett and transforms it into turbo-charged theatre. 

If Enron was finance for (crash test) dummies, Earthquakes is like being lectured on the environment by a troupe of go-go girls. 

Seats are uprooted to make way for a snaky bar-cum-catwalk-cum-river, with the audience seated on swivelling stools around it and two conventional stages at each end. 

It’s immersive theatre at the Cottesloe’s answer to Spaghetti Junction.

The story centres on three sisters: a once idealistic, now pragmatically icy Lib Dem minister (Lia Williams), a forthright, eye-rolling teen (Jessica Raine) and a pregnant and suicidal special needs teacher (Anne Madeley). 

Baby boomers and corporate greed are the targets with splintered shells trained on Primrose Hill parents, Coldplay and novelty Christmas books. 

The solution comes in act two, by way of futurism (by the end we’ve been catapulted into 2025), cabaret and cryogenics. 

At times exhausting, sometimes clichéd, but up there with Torvill and Dean for artistic impression.

Until September 22 • 020 7452 3000